Adoption: From Pain to Jubulation

I had an epiphany this week.  The past two years have been hard and sometimes very painful.  When I heard the word "adoption" I equated it with hardship.  When our new addition entered our lives we had no concept  of the legal battles, the financial issues, and the sick feeling we would experience when we were again and again presented with the fact that this wonderful child could be taken from our lives.  What I realized this week was that these were the birth pains for our third child.  They definitely took a different form than those I experience during the two natural child births I had, but believe me, I screamed just the same!

As we approached the finalization date of the adoption I was so excited, just like I had been as I approached my due dates.  I could not wait to be an actual permanent family.  To hold my son in my arms and know that he would always remain with us and we could love and nurture him in our home.  To know that his siblings would never have to experience having him removed to go live with strangers.  I was so excited; it felt unreal!

Then it happened!  We gathered with family and friends at the court house, swore and oath, signed some papers and the adoption was finalized!  Just like giving birth, I felt the release of stress, I felt elated, and I cried tears of joy.  Suddenly all the pain was worth it and even welcomed because of the blessing it brought.

Adoption is so beautiful!  Why?  Because it is the picture God chose to identify us as believers in Him.  We are adopted into His family and we are His heirs.  He is our "Abba, Father".  He too went through the 'birth pains' when He sacrificed His Son as our ransom.  And I am blown away that He loves each of us so much that He too knows the pain was worth it!

All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly realms because we are united with Christ. Even before He made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in His eyes. God decided in advance to adopt us into His own family by bringing us to Himself through Jesus Christ. This is what He wanted to do, and it gave Him great pleasure. So we praise God for the glorious grace He has poured out on us who belong to His dear Son. He is so rich in kindness and grace that He purchased our freedom with the blood of His Son and forgave our sins. He has showered his kindness on us, along with all wisdom and understanding.

Ephesians 1:3-8

Transparency

To my dismay, my daughter has decided she loves the band Superchick.  Their bublegum-pop sound is just too much for me.  The chirpy chorus "Cuz we've been down to the bottom, stories we've got em" rang out from the stereo and my husband commented sarcastically, "Yeah, I'm sure THEY'VE been down to the bottom".  In the past I would have quickly agreed with him, but in that instant I actually bristled and replied, "Maybe they have."  

You see, what I have learned over the past two years are that there is always a lot more going on in people's lives than we can ever guess.  I just spent the past year cringing every time someone would complement our family.  From the outside we apparently looked like we had it all together, but as I wrote in the post "Behind the Tattoo", I was losing my struggle with anger.  I had let it take roots so deep in my heart that I believed the lies of Satan more than the words of God that I had trusted in for so long.  There were times when I didn't just question my salvation, but I was entirely sure that I was not saved.  I thought I was destined for hell and I took some sick comfort in the promise of the coming punishment.

Of course God is faithful and He never left my side.  Through that dark time I learned so much about His abounding love, grace, and mercy.  I also learned the importance of not judging others.  I had always believed that we shouldn't judge the sin in other's lives because we are all sinners, but I had a bad habit of judging the perfection I saw in other's lives.  I would compare myself and envy other's "perfect" lives.  Once I became more vocal and open about my own struggles, people began to share their hardships too.  Some were so shocking because there was no outward indication that any of this was going on.  In my honesty I found such freedom!  As others opened up relationships became deeper and more authentic.  This is what God calls us to do.  We are to bear one another's burdens (Galatians 6:2).  We are to weep with those who weep and rejoice with those who rejoice (Romans 12:15).  When you are open with others people can pray for your real needs and then you can rejoice together as you watch God work.  Satan, the Father of Lies, wants us to withdraw and put up a front.  Why?  Because he is like a lion seeking whom he may devour (1 Peter 5:8).  Don't let it be you!  If you are going through something hard, gnarly, or even repulsive, find a trusted friend and be transparent with them.  It may be incredibly uncomfortable at first, but I am confident that ultimately you will be glad you did.

This is the message we heard from Jesus and now declare to you: God is light, and there is no darkness in him at all. So we are lying if we say we have fellowship with God but go on living in spiritual darkness; we are not practicing the truth. But if we are living in the light, as God is in the light, then we have fellowship with each other, and the blood of Jesus, His Son, cleanses us from all sin.  If we claim we have no sin, we are only fooling ourselves and not living in the truth. But if we confess our sins to Him, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness. 

1 John 1:5-9